Aaliyah

Today at The Death Pool we would like to welcome R&B singer Aaliyah who was recently killed in a plane crash in the Bahamas.

TDP:  Welcome Aaliyah.  It's a pleasure to have you here.

A:  Thank you very much.  I'm sad to have made it to The Death Pool but am glad that I get a chance to speak with my many fans.

TDP:  So I guess that as many of our other musician friends have told us that you are in Heaven.

A:  That is true.

TDP:  Aaliyah, that is a peculiar name.  Is it true that in Swahili that it means "the sound one makes when hit on the foot with a hammer"?

A:  No that is not true.  It means "highest most exulted one"!

TDP:  So you were the highest, huh?  Kicking it with the good weed.

A:  No you don't seem to understand.....

TDP:  That's ok you can come clean now.  You're no longer in the spotlight.

A:  Look, can we just get on with the interview about my career?  Some of my music or acting.

TDP:  Sure.  I'm listening to one of you're songs now.

A:  Oh really, which one?

TDP:  Oh you know, the one that goes.............bum bum bum  ladee da da dee.

A:  What?

TDP:  All right I admit it I'm not listening to your music right now.  I'm listening to Radiohead.  Have you ever heard them before?

A:  NO!  Can we talk about me?

TDP:  You see they have a sound that um.....how would I put it???  Doesn't sound like EVERY other thing on the damned radio!

A:  I didn't realize this was going to be a tirade against my music.

TDP:  Oh I'm sorry.  Let's move on.  Some have compared your death to Selena.

A:  Wow I'm honored.

TDP:  Don't be, her music sucked too.  Anyway,  wasn't she shot in the head?

A:  I think so.

TDP:  I see.

A:  Are you still there?

TDP:  Yeah,  I'm just really bored with this whole interview.   Hey kind of like your music.  You see, it's good to be original.

A:  That's it, I'm out of here.

TDP:  All right I'm sorry.  Let's see..........  um.........  nope.........  I got it.  Is it true that your name means "the sound one makes........

A:  You already said that.

TDP:  Oh, I did?  Sorry.  Kind of like your music.  See it sounded like everything else ever made and I asked a question that sounded like one I just asked.

A:  I get it, already.  You didn't care for my music.

TDP:  All right we'll move on.  Is it true that your plane was too heavy and that's why it crashed?

A:  That's what I hear.

TDP:  So was like Oprah on the plane with you or did you just have a lot of that awesome smoke with you?

A:  I didn't do drugs.  No Oprah was not on the plane.  It may have been a mistake to insist that I be paid in solid gold for my work.

TDP:  So you had solid gold on the plane.  How much?

A:  About 2 million worth.

TDP:  I'm surprised you got off the ground.  Now is it true that you were going to be in The Matrix 2?

A:  Yes, and I just......well......

TDP:  What is it?

A:  Well I guess I can tell the truth now.  You see I didn't see the original Matrix.

TDP:  Yeah.

A:  So you see I didn't know who the star of the original Matrix was.....

TDP:  Oh shit I think I get it.  You didn't know that you were going to have to act with Keanu Reeves.  Did you?

A:  No.

TDP:  So you're not all that sad about your situation then, huh.

A:  Kind of relieved.

TDP:  Got it.  Any final words?

A:  Well I'd just like to sing this one song. It goes a little something like this....Every day......................

TDP:  Damn, we got cut off       :-)