JFK Jr.

We would like to welcome to The Death Pool in our "Maiden Voyage" issue JFK Jr

TDP: First off J.J. Heaven, Hell or Purgatory?

JFK Jr.: Heaven.

TDP: Nice work

JFK Jr.: Thanks, it's kind of a shock who is here with me, though. Like Sonny Bono, I thought he was iffy at best. Nixon is here, he's a hoot. But that's about all I can tell you.

TDP: Understood. John John, Thanks for coming today it is a pleasure to hear from you

JFK Jr.: Thank you, I'm happy to be able to talk to all of you from beyond.

TDP: First off is there anything that you would like to say to your family and all the well wishers still on Earth?

JFK Jr.: Sure, ……………Oops.

TDP: That's it?

JFK Jr.: Yeah, man. I was cruising along at what I thought was ten thousand feet and the next thing I know I've got Mr Limpett in my lap and he's yelling abandon ship you fucking idiot

TDP: So what did you do?

JFK Jr.: I tried to undo my seat belt and the next thing I knew my Dockers were around my ankles. I realized that I had undone the belt on my pants. At that point I just said fuck it. There wasn't anyway I was getting out alive.

TDP: How does it feel being dead and knowing that you will never soil another 22 year olds panties or ask another thought provoking question like "What's you're favorite fruit?" to our government leaders.

JFK Jr.: I'm cool with it. I'm already hanging out with my other relatives, doing some skiing and bike riding and that Marilyn Monroe, man is she a piece of ass.

TDP: Any tidbits that you've learned in your short time in Heaven?

JFK Jr.: Sure, don't piss the "Old Man" off. He's a little testy and still a bit pissed off about the assassination and all. He said that he was riding in a damn parade and the next thing he knew, mom was cramming his cerebellum back in his ear. I tried to joke with him about it, you know just telling him that he wouldn't want to have lived anyway cause he would have been in a wheelchair and his dick wouldn't work. But he got a little steamed and stormed off. I haven't heard from in a couple of hours. I saw him doing bong hits with Jimmie Hendrix and I think that has mellowed him out a bit.

TDP: How about your wife, how is she taking the whole thing? What about your sister in law.

JFK Jr.: Oh, fuck me! I'm never going to hear the end of it. You think in- laws on earth are tough. I'm screwed for eternity. So I made a mistake, kill me.

TDP: Well, I see that our connection is running low, any final thoughts?

JFK Jr.: I would like to tell everyone that life isn't all it's cracked up to be so take it easy, have fun but try and stay away from Martha's Vineyard cause that place is a death trap, man. I don't know what it is, maybe the Perrier or something but we're dropping like flies out there. Oh yeah, Go Yankees.

TDP: Thanks, J.J.

JFK Jr.: Peace out!

So there you have it the man himself. Till our next visitor makes his entrance, see you later.